“Lizzy,” he laughed. “I’m in the jail. I’ll send you a VO so you can come see me”
“You better do it quick cause I’m moving out of Conway’s soon”
“Marni’s, it’s cheaper, South London”
“South! Och! Don’t expect me to cross the river to see you”
As soon as the Visitors Order arrived, Marni and I took the train to Edinburgh, we stayed with one of her old college fuck’s.
Fraser was on remand, he’d tried to do a post office job with two of his childhood friends from Arbroath – stoned. Carrying baseball bats in a sports bag Fraser and one of his mates went inside and stood behind the couner while the third waited outside in the getaway car they’d nicked earlier.
I sat in a visitors booth, Fraser was led in by a prison officer. He sat opposite me and we grinned at each other. It felt like being back at school in the naughty kids classroom.
“I just said ‘Give me the money’” Fraser laughed. He couldn’t stop sniggering.
“What happened?” I couldn’t see what was so funny.
“He said, he said, he shook his head, then he said”
“Go on, fuck sake Fraser, it’s not that funny”
“He said, ‘times must be hard’ ” we were both laughing now. “Then he hit the button and the bizzes came.”
“You idiot” we were in hysterics. I pictured it, Fraser, baseball bat, track suit, hoody, sports bag, ‘give me the money’.
“I’m gonna get bail, I’ll be out soon.” He told me about old friends of his that were also banged up in HMP Saughton. “It’s not so bad in here”.
We snogged over the partition until a prison officer told him to go back to his cell. I wrote to Fraser weekly and he sent me blue prison letters twice a week. He had lots to say about 23 hour lock up, I didn’t write much because I didn’t want him to be jealous. Fraser had asked me to stay with him and I’d agreed, I would be there for him when he got out, but I hadn’t agreed to remain faithful. We were truly in love, being unfaithful would mean nothing. It wasn’t my fault he’d been an idiot.